Most forms of abuse result in powerful feelings of anger or rage, which
must be expressed in a safe, positive fashion if it is not to either
destroy you or others.  I'd like to present an alternate method of dealing
with the anger through a ritual--allowing you to purge the energy safely
and then let it go. 

For this ritual, you will need some quiet time, a red candle, a black or a
white candle, paper and writing implements, a container in which to burn
paper, and matches.  Any other symbols, magickal gear, or accoutrements
you wish to bring to the ritual are yours to choose; I'm just presenting
the bare bones. 

Once you have gathered your stuff and set up your quiet space, you will
want to call in a circle to protect yourself, and to protect others from
the energies you plan to release.  Face the east, and call upon the air to
help you express your rage clearly, to help you focus mentally while you
release your emotions safely within the circle.  Face the south, and call
upon fire to help your rage burn up and out of you, burning away the past
and the trauma that has enraged you.  Face the west, and call upon the
water to help your emotions flow freely within the circle, cleansing your
spirit and restoring yourself.  Face the north, and call upon the earth to
allow you to safely ground your rage, and to sustain and support your
through the releasing process.  As you call in the directions, visualize a
circle of white light forming around your working space, shielding you and
protecting you with the elements you've called in.  (I have sometimes
found that it also helps to call upon the archangels to further strengthen
the circle--Raphael for east, Michael for south, Gabriel for west, and
Uriel for north--if your beliefs trend that way.)

Then when you feel the circle is secure, call upon the Higher Powers in
whatever form you relate to them to work with you and shield you through
the course of the ritual. 

Now, light the red candle.  By its light, begin to write or draw what it
is that is enraging you, whether it be some form of emotional abuse that
trashed your worth as a person, sexual abuse that made you into an object,
physical abuse that broke your body's connection with your mind, or
whatever.  Focus on making the issues clear to yourself and the Higher
Powers that you've called in.  Focus on how the actions made *you* feel,
not on the other person's guilt or motivations, or on revenge on the other
person.  (You can do this part ahead of time, if you want.  I wrote a long
letter to my mother explaining exactly what I remembered and felt out of
our abusive relationship, being careful to keep it in "I-statements" and
not start blaming her.  Blame may be necessary for some folks, but until
you release the rage within, I feel that you cannot assess blame 
rationally and safely.)

Next, hold the paper between your hands, focus your awareness on the red
candle, and begin to chant, shout, scream, or make whatever sounds help
you to feel the rage come up and leave you.  Send the rage into the red
candle.  Focus your rage on the red candle, watching the flames burn
brighter and hotter as the force of your anger fuels them.  When you feel
that you've released the red rage as much as you can, light the papers on
which you've drawn or written your problem and drop them into the
container so they can burn out.  (Do remember to put something under the
container to protect the surface it rests on--we did this ritual as a
group a couple of years ago and caught the carpet on fire.)

After the papers have begun to burn down, light the black or white candle. 
(The choice of color depends on how you wish to focus on restoring
yourself--black represents the energy of transformation and white
represents and energy of peace and purification.) Focus on what you'd like
to replace the rage with--peace, self-esteem, happiness, or whatever.  Let
the energy of the new emotions fill you up.  Write or draw on a new piece
of paper those things that you want to find in yourself and your life now
that you've released the poisonous rage that was holding you back.  You
could even take the ashes from the burnt paper and write the name of the
emotion on a new piece of paper to help you focus.  Feel the healing

When you are comfortably calm again, release the energy of the circle. 
Visualize it sinking back into the earth as you thank the elements at each
direction for watching over you.  Thank the Higher Powers for their
insight and help.  Let the candles burn completely out.